From Sarah

It’s Monday of the week we expect to hear the results of Chris’s biopsy, and I thought I’d hop on with some thoughts. I can’t let Chris be the only one with a platform! 

Many of you have expressed anxiety about this waiting period and sympathy for how hard the waiting is. Oddly, the waiting hasn’t been hard at all. Maybe it’s because these days feel like our last before things really start to change. Also, and maybe more looming, hearing a medical declaration about Chris’s life and what we should or can expect for it, feels like the beginning of a steep descent. We know a valley is ahead. We don’t know where it will lead exactly. We know it will be deep, and we know it will be dark. And we fear that with medical knowledge stated clearly to us, we will have a harder time holding on to a sense of hope

A friend texted me last week and said this: I will be praying for your appointment in a few days. I’m going to pray that you’ll walk away from it with more hope than when you got there.

What a profound thought. I felt my mind blown open with possibility. Appointment day—hearing the words spoken to us that we already know will be so heavy—may not end up being the hardest day of our lives thus far. Or, even if it is the hardest day, it doesn’t have to be devastating. I had only been imagining that day as dark and despairing. But the LORD will be there. How will he show himself? These are the things I can think about and imagine as I anticipate the appointment. What will the Lord do in our hearts that day? What will he bring to mind? With what will he comfort us? What will he speak to us about himself? How will he simply calm us with his love? I believe he will be with us. And I believe his hope can come in so many forms. 

I would not have put us here. I would never have willingly offered this—the seeming stability of our family—to be changed in these ways and in the ways we do not yet know. But here we are. Our hearts are open. What do you want to give us, Lord? Deepen us. Transform us. Open our eyes. Open our ears. Fill us. We want all that you have to give us. 

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  20. Ann Jett

    Chris, Sarah, Jesse, Ruthie, Andrew and sweet Mary,
    I am so grateful for your sweet family and grateful that we have a Holy Spirit who will pray even when we don’t know how. I praise our Heavenly Father that he has given you family, friends and a Church family who love you. You will continually be in my prayers.

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  21. Patti Gehringer

    Sarah, you and Chris are in my prayers. Your strength is in the Lord, your hope is in the Lord, your peace is in the Lord, His love endures forever. We pray in unity for you, Chris and your family.

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  22. Sara Baugh

    Sarah, you gave me a hug at a time I most needed one, and now I give you and Chris hugs every day as I pray for Chris’ healing. “At all times you are accompanied by God’s presence and strengthened by His grace.” God bless you both.

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  23. gerald mcdermott

    Sarah, you write so beautifully and poignantly. Your faith is luminous. God is clearly showering you and Chris already with grace. Our prayer is that you and Chris continue to get the strength that comes from faith and joy. “The joy of the Lord is your strength” (Nehemiah).
    Fr Gerry (and Jean)

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  24. Randy and Karen Westerman

    Chris and Sarah, this morning we prayed for you both and for your family. We prayed you will ABSORB HIS strength, ABSORB HIS peace, and ABSORB HIS joy. We were deeply encouraged as we read your blog, and are trusting you to the one who already knows each step of the journey ahead, whether a mountain top or a deep valley. Much love to you all.

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  25. Courtney Groover

    This is so beautiful. I’m filled with hope from your encouraging words. THANK YOU! Love you so much! The LORD is with you.
    Courtney

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  26. Duski

    You and Chris are giving us a beautiful gift by sharing your story and letting us see Jesus in you! It is deepening my love for Him, increasing my faith in the assurance of His presence in suffering, and motivating me even more to join you in prayer and worship. Thank you so much. I love you!! Praying so much.

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  27. Anonymous

    Hey guys, so saddened to hear of your situation. My wife and I are praying it’s a GIST rather than adeno. We can’t imagine what you are going through right now. As you said, we hope you come out of your appointment with more hope.

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  28. Powers Laurie Rogers

    Sarah, I jumped on and saw your post. My heart as a wife is connecting with you. My heart as a mother is connecting with you. But the one area my heart is deeply connecting with you is as a daughter of the Most High King. I sense your trust in our Father. I sense your hands wide open no matter what, anticipating all that He has planned for you, whether in the valley or on the mountaintop.
    I printed off the picture of your family so I can be daily reminded to walk alongside you and Chris in prayer. Thank you for sharing!

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  29. Rob and Sarah Galarza

    Chris and Sarah – you are in our prayers. There is such power in hope, and I pray that you overflow with it, regardless of the outcome of the biopsy. You can and will overcome this though the One who is the source of all our strength. Much love to you and your family. ♥

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